Numb...

I am beyond words right now. I want so badly to see my therapist and to talk with her, but I know that in just a few short hours, I will have to start the waiting process all over again...and that it will be another 2 weeks...which quite possibly could be even worse than the one week stints I've been managing ever so slightly. I can feel myself crumbling away. Reality doesn't stay put for more than 5 minutes at a time anymore. There is no happiness or pleasantness...it's all just pain. I'm sure everyone is sick of hearing me complain about it, too. I miss school and my friends and my activities. But I'm pretty sure I'm farther from getting back there than ever. Life just sucks right now. I should go to bed...I don't know why I even try anymore. I mean, I'm just going to wake up in the morning...unfortunately.